Your own psychology can work against you if you don’t have a reference point from which to evaluate your own beliefs. Some people never have success with intentions or affirmations because their subconscious tells them that they won’t work. If you have difficulty holding onto positive beliefs that are life transforming, here are some ways to quiet those nay-saying voices and get them rooting for you.
Get Familiar With Your Inner Critics
Sit in a quiet area for a few minutes and try this exercise to find those voices working against you.
Sit in your favorite meditation spot and take a few deep breaths to relax.
Say the following statements and listen for any responses from inside:
“I am going to become an astronaut.”
“I am going to become a billionaire.”
“I am going to become President of the United States.”
Unless you’re already an astronaut, a billionaire, or the President (in which case we thank you for reading this article), note how passionate the voices in you respond. You’ll hear responses ranging from “Oh, right, that’ll never happen!” to maniacal laughter. These critical voices are not being cruel. Their job is to keep you safe. Their response is to keep you from moving in a direction that they believe is unproductive and a waste of your time and money.
Now try some more realistic statements and see if the same voices present themselves:
“I am going to start a small business.”
“I am going to finish my college degree.”
“I am going to write my novel.”
These are typical of the dreams of many people, yet you may still have the voices saying “No, you can’t do that.” The problem is that your system cannot believe that you can achieve those goals, likely because they have no reference point to compare the achievement to.
Building Up Your Internal Cheerleading Team
To get your subconscious voices on your side, you need to give them a way to say “Yes, we can see that happening” even though you have no track record with the activity. It’s one thing to say “I have already written a book so I can write another one” and another to say “I have never written a book but will now write my novel.”
When You Know Someone With the Experience
Let’s say that you want to write a book. You have a friend named Chris who has written and published a book. Take some time and do the following meditation exercise.
Sit quietly and take a few breaths to relax.
Think or say the following thoughts slowly:
“My friend Chris wrote and published a book.”
“I am as smart as my friend Chris.”
“I am as educated as my friend Chris.”
“I am as good a writer as my friend Chris.”
“Since Chris has written a book, I can write a book.”
Feel free to add statements that are relevant when comparing you to your friend Chris. They must be statements that your subconscious believes to be true in order for it to agree with the premise that since Chris wrote a book, you can, too.
When You don’t Know Anyone Personally With the Experience
What if you don’t know anyone who has written and published a book? You can still create resources to which your subconscious can refer to form a belief about your abilities.
Get into a meditative state again and focus on the following statements:
“Many people around the world have written a book.”
“Many people my age have written a book.”
“Many people with my education level have written a book.”
“Many people with a similar work background as me have written a book.”
“Since these people have written a book, I can write a book.”
The goal here is to come up with statements that the subconscious cannot deny. It’s good to be specific, but be careful not to introduce statements that create doubt. The statement “Many red-haired females living in Bangor, Maine on a horse ranch have written a book” is too specific. This may cause your subconscious to say “Hmmm…don’t know about that one.”
You can improve the positive criticism you get from your subconscious, whether you personally know people who have had an experience that you wish to have, or not. The more numerous and believable your statements, the harder it is for your subconscious to deny you your dream.